Rock
Scissors
Fuck
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
I'm bleeding and have questions
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
Randomize
