yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
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