great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Randomize
