What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
Randomize
