So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
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