I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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