so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Randomize
