We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
