Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
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