btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
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He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
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it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
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