There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
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