She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Randomize
