Having your wife answer your cell was so lame. Maybe we can talk when you get your phone, your facebook account, and your balls back.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
i think my cat just said my name.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
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