Xanax induced break ups are the best. Since I'm a professional fiancee, I'm going to break up with them on Xanax from now on. It didn't hurt one tiiiiiny bit.
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
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