My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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