At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
Randomize
