I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
