God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Randomize
