I will die if light touches me.
I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
Randomize
