what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
