my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
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