"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
Randomize
