Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
Randomize
