the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
