I feel like I'm in dance class right now
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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