I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
Randomize