ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
Randomize
