as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
Randomize