I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
Randomize
