I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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