peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
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