Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize
