her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Randomize
