she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
My boss couldn’t find her phone so she asked me to call it and when I found it the screen said Fuck Toy was calling. I’m very much okay with this
Randomize