Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
