you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
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