We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Randomize
