pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
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