I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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