great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize
