Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
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