this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Randomize
