you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Randomize
