This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
Naked. naked and bneed help.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
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