names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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