i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
drinking out of a sandbucket again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
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