eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
Randomize