Quick, to the slutcave!
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Randomize
