either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
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