Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
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